Tuesday, March 8, 2011

Waiting for Godot—in My Garden

This is busy month around here because I am back to being a part-time single parent. My husband had to rush off to California with wine work to do before bud break, so I am back to holding down the fort by myself. In the meantime, I am sorting and planting seeds, fostering the kids, and planning a quick vacation to California for my Spring Break. I feel bad that our home will not be available for foster kids, but so far, all of them are actually happy that I will be getting out. Too bad they groan when I fill them in on my ulterior motive: San Francisco Flower & Garden Show.
This is our four-year-old part-feral cat that is no longer as feral as she used to be. Monabelle was like a ghost, but now she is showing more interest in my activities than ever before. I just feel bad that she misses her buddy—my husband.
Prolonged drawn out explanations for my as-of-yet absent summaries of Seattle talks will not appear here today. Instead, suffice it to say, I am waiting, I have been waiting, and I've waited. Currently I am going through the third diagnosis experience in my life and I've forgotten how much I don't like waiting. This time it feels like a more serious problem so hence my Godot title. I try not to think over the meaning of life while I am knocked out by some kind of mysterious malady, but then plants just cannot keep my mind away from the worry swirling around inside of me—dancing around the drain without going away to wherever it should go.

Last night I was trying to read, which is really difficult to do if you have chronic illness and pain, and I found this funny quote by the author of the drama already discussed in this post, "What do I know of man's destiny? I could tell you more about radishes." Samuel Beckett was (and still is) my kind of guy.

With that in mind, I will head out for my biopsy today, planning in my mind to return home refreshed to bury my worries elsewhere on the property—

8 comments:

  1. I hope the results of your biopsy come back good. It must be very stressful having to wait, the not knowing is always the worst part. Enjoy the garden show, I hope you'll share pictures of it.

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  3. It will take 10 workdays before we will know if Amyloidosis can be ruled out. I truly hope it will be, but part of me is doubtful.

    When the results come in, I will be safe in California enjoying the show. Funny I planned it that way, but a girl needs some fun!

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  4. Keeping my fingers crossed for you. I am constantly amazed that you cope with foster children whilst you are unwell.

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  5. Why do you have to wait for so long to get results? I can only imagine the stress of waiting.

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  6. I am doing better with the wait. The biopsy had to be sent to a specialist because it is not a common test. I am feeling more confident that it is something else. This is helping me to keep my mind on all of my sprouting seeds!

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  7. Very cute cat. We also have a formerly feral cat

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  8. I feel for you - those are some of the worst words - waiting for results. Hope and pray it will be a good result for you.

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